Why I’m So Quiet These Days

Hi everyone! 🙂

I’ve been a bit on the silent side the last few weeks, both on social media and with any non-work related emails. It started out as a writer break (the first I’ve taken in over a year) to give my brain a rest. From there, the avalanche of life decided to take some hard left turns. Normally at such junctions, I go outside and enjoy the sunshine, work in my garden, do some active exploration to get my head clear. Of course, Washington State decided to give spring and summer a miss this year and head straight into fall, so there is no warmth or sunshine to go outside and play in.

Or, there wasn’t until a few days ago. I digress…

Taking a break had the reverse effect I was hoping for. Instead of resting my brain and getting centered again, those pesky writer demons started a war, and they were merciless. To the point where I started questioning why I was writing, what was the point, then assessing that words and I are pretty much enemies.

Then… imposter syndrome rode into this battle and took a jab (several in fact). Sprinkle in some super obscure family stuff, physical weirdocrities happening, and you have my life. We’re talking an Everest Avalanche and I’m somewhere under the pile of snow freezing my ass off. Seriously, somebody throw me a blanket. Or a match.

But this post isn’t about the dark place, or how obscure my life has become in the matter of a few weeks. It’s about combating the darkness. Embracing the darkness. Watching all your plans flutter away, and making a choice about how to proceed.

I’m still here. Still writing. As I watch all the plans I had in place for the coming year turn into tighter and tighter deadlines, I’ve made the choice to let them all go. Because honestly… that’s all they are, an idea of what I wanted to accomplish. Nothing more. And the reality is they were deadlines I gave myself, so letting them go is a bit liberating.

Hopefully most of the writer demons have moved on. I’m sure we’ll meet again in the future, but for now there’s so many other things to spend my energy on.

So, with that said, stay tuned for future announcements on this blog.

• This summer I’m hoping to put up a series of workshop articles to help writers get from that first draft to a bright & shiny manuscript. Right now I have an outline of ideas I need to coalesce into a solid plan and series of workshop articles.
• In the fall I’ll be hard at work doing who knows what. I may come up with something for a fall blog escapade.
• December will bring a new Winterviews series with some new writers & artists, and revisiting last year’s amazing talent.

As for my stories, I’m not sure at this point. I’ve returned to an old (polished) Dragon Fantasy and I’m rebuilding it from the ground up. I think there’s something special in the story, and I hope I’m right. It opens up an entire series of worlds no one’s tasted yet. To be honest, it’s starting to feel like a better debut point (series wise) than my Medieval Sci-Fi. For now, I’m revisiting my older stories and reviewing what I have, what’s good, what could be better, and which worlds I’d really like to live in for the next few years.

Alright, that’s enough out of me. I should be a bit more active again in the coming weeks. If not, feel free to poke me via the contact form (right-column link), on twitter, or glare at me from afar until I feel that creepy, stalkerish chill going up my neck.

Cheers to all! 🙂